Hugs

Susan
Originally uploaded by MyxMaster.

I met Susan one Sunday afternoon standing in front of the Walgreens Pharmacy on Polk and California Street. She apologetically asked me for help and I turned to look at her. I saw a reflection of myself standing there. I knew that our lives weren't any different from one another, because we have the same needs, such as, food, warmth, and shelter. But, we also have the need to be loved, heard and understood, and the need to have significance. I became so focused on Susan that everyone around me and my surroundings became non-existent. It was as if we were the only ones standing there, facing one another. Compassion immediately began to flow out of my heart.

I told her about the $2 Portrait Project on Flickr and asked if she would pose for me. Susan was happy to oblige. I asked her to tell me a little bit about herself and Susan, without hesitation, immediately began to share. Susan has lived all over the United States, but she is originally from Michigan. She has also lived in Tacoma, WA, where I once lived and where my mother resides now. Her father was in the military, so they wouldn't stay in one place very long. I think the last city she said she lived in was Sacramento and then she eventually came to San Francisco, California, where she is living now.

After we talked, I gave her a big bear hug and I didn't let go of her until I knew she knew she was cared for. We both smiled and I told her to keep believing in herself and that things would get better. I went on my way and she continued to stand in her spot and ask for help, thanking everyone that gave or offered her any spare change.

My doctor of fifteen years suddenly past away last week, so I've been going over all the memories I have of him. My time with Susan brought up this memory. At the end of each office visit, he would give me a huge bear hug. It was in those moments that I knew that I was loved and cared for. He unknowingly taught me how hugs can make a big difference in a person's life. I wish I could tell him that fifteen years of hugs made me the man I am today. I would tell him thanks for loving me and showing me how important it is to show others that they are loved too. I dedicate this post to my friend, Dr. Robert C. Scott and all that he has done for me. Thanks, Dr. Scott.

Please visit:

Allen Temple Baptist Church AIDS Ministry

Risk Poem

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out to another is to risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self.
To place your dreams, ideas before a crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.To hope is to risk despair.
To try is to risk failure.

But risks must be taken, because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, and is nothing.

They may avoid suffering and sorrow, but they cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love, live. Chained by their certitudes, they are a slave: they have forfeited their freedom.

Only a person who risks is truly free.

- Anonymous

Perfection

I live near the Castro in San Francisco and sometimes I wonder what some people are striving for? Is it perfection? Are some of the people I see portraying themselves as someone they feel will be acknowledged by others? Is the idea of perfection keeping some people from being themselves, so often that they forget who they are? Instead of being themselves, they become intertwined with man's idea of what perfection is?

I've always wanted to be accepted by others and I would mold myself into the person I thought people would want to hang out with. But now, I'm compelled to be honest about every aspect of my life; spiritually, emotionally, and physically. Why keep something from someone that you know they'll find out about you later anyways? If your going to reject me, do it now, please, don't try to be polite. I spent a lot of my life living for others. I was trying to live up to every one's expectations of who they needed me to be and not who I wanted to be. News Flash! Perfection is unobtainable. Every one has faults.

Have you ever looked into a person's eyes and into their soul? There's a bible verse that goes something like this, "God does not see as man sees, man looks at the appearance, but God looks at the heart." 1 Sam 16:7 Again, "a man looks at his natual face in a mirror. He observes it and goes a way and immediately forgets what kind of man he is." James 1:23-24 Next time, you look into the mirror, look past your face and into your soul. What kind of man are you? What do you stand for? Where are you going? Who are you? Have you forgotten?

I've given up on perfection. Now, I just try to be the best I can be. Faults and all. Love yourself unconditionally. Who cares what other people think! Be unique. If people don't like you for who you are, don't get all bent out of shape. Stand up for yourself. Don't compromise. Let them own it. You don't have too.

Peace!